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Confessions of an Email Hoarder

1/14/2018

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I’m going to confess something to you:

I, Auntie Anxiety, am an email hoarder 😬

As I write this I am taking a break from  working on one of my goals (not resolutions, because, say it with me now, "Fuck Resolutions" 😜) to get better systems in place which will make my life easier (this the “Why" that I keep referring to when I want to quit my project of dealing with the  11,000 emails in my inbox and give into the Anxiety around losing an important email and just leave them all there 😫).

Now, you may be asking yourself “Why did you choose a goal around systems rather than having more sex with you husband?” and my first response might be “None ya’ business Nosey 😜”, but my second response would be “Having personal and business goals are both important!”

With any goal that we set, the important part is to answer the “Why?” for ourselves.  My “Why” is part of walking my talk.  I encourage clients to have systems in place to make their lives easier, so it is important for me to walk that talk too!

That being said, I want to throw something else at you today:

Part of me did not want to share this goal with you.  

I was going to just complete this project and pretend like it never happened. 


This email hoarding “issue” was going to be a secret that I was going to take to my grave.  You know why?

Because sometimes I feel like a fraud, a fake, an imposter. 

Yep, Anxiety loves to taunt me with this one.  It will get in my ear when I am struggling with something and whisper, “You don’t know what you are talking about. The fraud police are going to show up at your door and haul you away. Then all of your friends and family and clients will know you don’t have a clue.” 

It sucks!  I have confidence about so many things, but Anxiety knows it can get me with this one.

Every. Single. Time. 😣

The good news? I know how to talk back.  I know how to NOT reassure myself, but rather how to actually tell Anxiety to "Bite Me" and to get back to just being me, flaws and all.

See, knowing that you are not a fake, fraud, or imposter has to come from inside, not from outside.  How many times have your parents, friends, teachers, professors, bosses, colleagues, or other people who “know” you  tell you how wonderful you are?  And how many times have to thought to yourself, “If you only knew?” 

No one else can tell us who we are.  We have to discover, accept, and embrace ourselves for ourselves! 

How do we do that?  We start by recognizing that the voice of doubt is coming out of the mouth of Anxiety as a way to “protect” us from those nasty feelings of failure.  If we just go ahead and feel like a failure, then, when we are found out by the fraud police, it won’t hurt so much….

Ponder that for a bit…I have some emails to attend to 😘

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Lynn R. Dutrow, your Anti-Anxiety Ally, is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and Courage Coach.

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